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第十二章 我不是人啊(第1 / 2页)

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弹幕彻底统一,全部都在刷:

【干饭人,干饭魂,干饭人吃饭只用盆!】

本就是傍晚饭点,一边吃外卖,一边看直播的人越来也多,白釉吃的也是家常饭,但是那种满足的幸福感,实在太真实了。

“叮叮叮~”

是有人刷游艇,送礼物的声音,记得当初打算直播挣钱的时候,她做梦都想听到这样的声音。

白釉扫了一眼,果然发现一直跟在她身后,脸已经彻底黑了的沫沫。

沫沫心里苦。

她像是小说里那种,那种饰演反派工具人的小笨茶,憋着坏,却一而再,再而三地成就白釉的高光时刻!

呜呜呜呜!

“嗝~”

白釉让她坐在自己身边,指着她的手机说,

“没被收吗?你怎么还能玩手机呢?”

沫沫在心里赌气,她就不信,吃了整整一大盆,白釉能不吐?

而且,她这次有备而来。

她早就花了重金!雇了上万黑粉喷子,混在直播间里,誓要把直播间的“骂到她退圈”的节奏带起来。

她把手机递到了白釉面前,并说出了约定好的暗号,

“我们都是来看你的。”

喷子立刻开始工作:

【睡了一天,生产队的驴有这么懒的吗?】

屏幕瞬间就蹦出这么一条黑评,白釉吃的爽,心情也不差,于是笑吟吟地回怼了过去,

“天黑了,起床了,吃了一盆我又行了!”

【颜真的吹不起,紫色美瞳cos巴啦啦小魔仙吗?】

“本尊,古他妈,司雷之神!呸!”白釉的深渊巨口里面全是饭,说错了,

“古拉稀,司雷之神!”

嗯?

还是不对……

白釉问坐对面的喂饭小哥哥,

“古拉啥来着?古拉驴?”

捂得严严实实的江明野:……

小魔仙还真跟他没啥关系……

正常的粉丝都被逗得嘎嘎大笑,只有沫沫买的水军,格格不入,还在复制文案:

【唱跳全废还敢进A班,你配吗?】

“就你配,跟滴顶配,跟滴滴绝配,跟走地鸡天仙配!”

直播间有敏感词屏蔽,白釉的某几个字直接被消音了,但这就像是完形填空,给了弹幕文学家无数的创作空间。

【人间理想田白釉,唱跳全能田白釉……】

“有眼光!”白釉满意地吞了半个猪蹄。

马上弹幕又跳出了一条,

【(空瓶文案五毛一条,欢迎垂询。)】

白釉的脸瞬间就黑了,一口银牙把酥软的猪骨直接咬碎,

“敢这样骂我,你不怕遭雷劈吗?闲的你,快去找个电子厂上班吧!”

“一个个的抓周都拿的键盘啊?哎,不对……”白釉回过味来了,她碰了碰身边的沫沫,

“我没钱,所以我买不起粉丝,那么……这个空瓶文案哪里来的?”

“我,我踏马哪知道……”沫沫低着头,手上的长指甲抠着充电宝。

食堂桌子上本就不是很干净,一行污水顺着桌子的缝隙往下淌。

不知不觉之中,沫沫已经把充电宝的保护层抠了个大洞,水渍滴在上面——

“呲——”地一声,火光瞬间将整个充电宝裹住。

“啊!”

沫沫的手被电流狠狠一击,整个身子好似尼古拉斯·赵四一样颤抖,跳跃的电火离子却攀在了她浓密纤长的秀发之上。

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